Bye Bye Boarding School?
Boarding schools have been in quiet decline for twenty years now. To my mind, that can only be a Good Thing.
In spite of Harry Potter and Hogwarts, the number of children in independent boarding schools in the UK is now down to 68,000. This gentle decline has every prospect of being accelerated by the impact on middle class parents of having to fork out for university tuition fees on top of paying for a private education. So far so good: after all, why does anyone want to send their children to boarding school?
Well, for those of you who want to, it seems that The Market is coming to the rescue. A few months ago, The Sunday Times Money Section focussed on the savings to be had from sending children to be educated at boarding schools in France, Ireland, Spain and even South Africa. It seems that if you choose the right place you could save up to £15,000 a year on fees and still get a “public school” education. What a bargain!
It is true that if you are considering private education for your children, there is a financial element involved, but please, hang on a moment. We are not talking about outsourcing a call centre or a manufacturing facility here. We are talking about your children.
There were four of us. Like many children with a father in the Armed Forces, we were sent to boarding school because moving every two years was severely disrupting our education. Between us, we went to three different boarding schools and all of us were bullied at some point.
One sister’s dormitory mates used to stick pins in her when she was in bed at night. Another’s “friends” used to steal her school books so that she would get into trouble for not doing her work. When staff did eventually acknowledge that there was a problem, the solution was to put her in a dormitory on her own. This isolated her still further and left the bullies in power in the dormitory. I was pretty lucky, I just got “sent to Coventry” regularly, which meant that people didn’t talk to me for a couple of days. I even did a little bullying of my own.
It’s not just the potential bullying from other children that should concern parents. It’s what happens if a member of staff decides that they don’t like your child’s face.
My eldest sister was placed in solitary confinement for two days by one Headmistress. She was accused (incorrectly) of breaking a bath plug chain. It took those two days to convince one of the sixth formers to call my parents and tell them what was happening. We were all terrified of the Headmistress and it appears that the staff were terrified too, because not one of them did anything to help.
We had a good relationship with our parents, but we still found it difficult to talk about what was going on in a way that enabled them to take it seriously. I don’t think we were quite sure what would happen if we did tell them. In addition, we knew that our parents were making big financial sacrifices for our sake. There was the feeling of being somehow at fault, as though we were the ones to blame for what was going on.
The Independent Schools Council, the body which claims to represent the bulk of independent schools in the UK, suggests that one reason parents may want to consider boarding school for their children is that it "avoids the trouble and expense of daily travel". Is it just me or does that sentence take your breath away too?
The ISC urges parents to dismiss the “reminiscences” of people like me. Boarding schools are different now, they say. Well, they might be . . . but are children? In a superbly revealing statement, it points out that most parents who send their children to boarding school choose one which is less than an hour’s journey away from home. . . You have to ask yourself: “if it’s so close, why send them away?”
What is wrong with allowing your children to go to school from home? Yes, they will be difficult and challenging at times, but they will be going through those difficult and challenging times with you. They (and you) will not have to rely on some housemaster or housemistress who is also responsible for the welfare of several dozen other pupils - some or all of whom may be going through crises of their own.
Once you send your child to boarding school, you may choose to maintain the illusion that your house is their “home” but they have effectively moved into a parallel universe into which you will get no more than an occasional glimpse. It can be hard enough to keep the lines of communication open between parents and children when they do live together: how much harder will it be if the bulk of their time is spent somewhere else entirely?
Let’s put that last statement into context. If your child goes to boarding school at the age of eight (which is not unusual) and then goes off to university, they will never live in your house again for more than two months at a time. Are you – and your child – happy for them to leave home that soon?
Useful website: http://www.isc.co.uk/
Boarding schools have been in quiet decline for twenty years now. To my mind, that can only be a Good Thing.
In spite of Harry Potter and Hogwarts, the number of children in independent boarding schools in the UK is now down to 68,000. This gentle decline has every prospect of being accelerated by the impact on middle class parents of having to fork out for university tuition fees on top of paying for a private education. So far so good: after all, why does anyone want to send their children to boarding school?
Well, for those of you who want to, it seems that The Market is coming to the rescue. A few months ago, The Sunday Times Money Section focussed on the savings to be had from sending children to be educated at boarding schools in France, Ireland, Spain and even South Africa. It seems that if you choose the right place you could save up to £15,000 a year on fees and still get a “public school” education. What a bargain!
It is true that if you are considering private education for your children, there is a financial element involved, but please, hang on a moment. We are not talking about outsourcing a call centre or a manufacturing facility here. We are talking about your children.
There were four of us. Like many children with a father in the Armed Forces, we were sent to boarding school because moving every two years was severely disrupting our education. Between us, we went to three different boarding schools and all of us were bullied at some point.
One sister’s dormitory mates used to stick pins in her when she was in bed at night. Another’s “friends” used to steal her school books so that she would get into trouble for not doing her work. When staff did eventually acknowledge that there was a problem, the solution was to put her in a dormitory on her own. This isolated her still further and left the bullies in power in the dormitory. I was pretty lucky, I just got “sent to Coventry” regularly, which meant that people didn’t talk to me for a couple of days. I even did a little bullying of my own.
It’s not just the potential bullying from other children that should concern parents. It’s what happens if a member of staff decides that they don’t like your child’s face.
My eldest sister was placed in solitary confinement for two days by one Headmistress. She was accused (incorrectly) of breaking a bath plug chain. It took those two days to convince one of the sixth formers to call my parents and tell them what was happening. We were all terrified of the Headmistress and it appears that the staff were terrified too, because not one of them did anything to help.
We had a good relationship with our parents, but we still found it difficult to talk about what was going on in a way that enabled them to take it seriously. I don’t think we were quite sure what would happen if we did tell them. In addition, we knew that our parents were making big financial sacrifices for our sake. There was the feeling of being somehow at fault, as though we were the ones to blame for what was going on.
The Independent Schools Council, the body which claims to represent the bulk of independent schools in the UK, suggests that one reason parents may want to consider boarding school for their children is that it "avoids the trouble and expense of daily travel". Is it just me or does that sentence take your breath away too?
The ISC urges parents to dismiss the “reminiscences” of people like me. Boarding schools are different now, they say. Well, they might be . . . but are children? In a superbly revealing statement, it points out that most parents who send their children to boarding school choose one which is less than an hour’s journey away from home. . . You have to ask yourself: “if it’s so close, why send them away?”
What is wrong with allowing your children to go to school from home? Yes, they will be difficult and challenging at times, but they will be going through those difficult and challenging times with you. They (and you) will not have to rely on some housemaster or housemistress who is also responsible for the welfare of several dozen other pupils - some or all of whom may be going through crises of their own.
Once you send your child to boarding school, you may choose to maintain the illusion that your house is their “home” but they have effectively moved into a parallel universe into which you will get no more than an occasional glimpse. It can be hard enough to keep the lines of communication open between parents and children when they do live together: how much harder will it be if the bulk of their time is spent somewhere else entirely?
Let’s put that last statement into context. If your child goes to boarding school at the age of eight (which is not unusual) and then goes off to university, they will never live in your house again for more than two months at a time. Are you – and your child – happy for them to leave home that soon?
Useful website: http://www.isc.co.uk/
posted by Susan Darnbrough at
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